I don’t quite get it. André Carbonaro, a faithful assistant of Nationalist MEP David Casa, gets taken to task for a bad joke (as in, humourless) which likens Labour to a condom, which he posted on Facebook. And then he earns himself instant Labour notoriety – just like that – complete with press statement, a nifty news piece on One News, and the bare-faced solemnity of Jason Micallef condemning such depraved and dissolute humour.
Obviously someone’s a bit high here. And if they are, I want to know what they’re getting. I want to know which drug turns you into Senator John McCarthy.
These are obtuse moments in politics, lazy points aimed at keeping the diehards huffing. The PM could be expected to announce an election next week, so the electoral machines are in overdrive. And ever since Alfred Sant had his tumour removed, the Torquemadas at Mile End have been intent on sniffing out the least provocative remarks that could be interpreted as “personal attacks” on the “Labour leadership”, as they described it in their press statement.
Of course, it makes David Casa look a bit like an idiot, that having been the aim of the entire exercise. Labour demanded that the MEP “take necessary action against such vulgarity” – which Casa did, reportedly instructing Carbonaro to remove the condom joke. It must have been one of the few times Casa was in such a hurry to pull it off.
What Casa didn’t do is to “state what disciplinary action will be taken against Mr Carbonaro” – as Labour’s brusque press statement demanded. I am sure that it’s with reassurance that Mr Carbonaro has turned out to be very conscious of safe sex.

Prof. Anthony Zammit, the surgeon who was entrusted with Sant’s condition in December, was propelled to centre-stage Thursday evening at the Labour general conference – turning out to be not quite as self-effacing as previously thought.
During his speech, Zammit was reported to have claimed that “we emerged triumphant” when referring to the surgical operation he carried out on Sant. I say, was that personal pronoun correct? Was it ‘we’ as in doctor and patient perhaps?
Here is the glaring contradiction in the way the entire Sant affair has been handled. First, a media blackout was imposed on Sant’s condition, even though it was clear what the medical intervention required was given Anthony Zammit’s medical specialty. That soon prompted a leak to another newspaper from someone who was privy to the most intimate of details concerning Sant’s surgery. Then, when the speculation became too much to handle, Sant himself finally put a stop to it with a premature appearance to quell all doubts about his medical condition.
Now, Anthony Zammit, a political nobody who is hoping his surgical prowess lands him a seat in parliament, has turned to his celebrity patient as a platform for his own political gain. As the good doctor himself said in his speech: “where is the professional ethic?”

Unfortunately, this last line makes it sound like I am replicating the Nationalist Party’s press statement commenting on Zammit’s speech.
The PN in fact retorted when Zammit thanked Sant for showing trust in the Maltese medical profession. In an obvious reference to Eddie Fenech Adami, he said that while Sant availed himself of Maltese doctors, “others” went to the US. Gosh, the plot thickens!
Anyway, in response the PN came back charging that Eddie Fenech Adami had gone to the Mayo Clinic on advice from his doctors, including Dr Mario Vassallo, the same specialist consulted by Sant. Fenech Adami was sent to the US because no conclusions could be drawn from the diagnosis in Malta. And once at the Mayo clinic, Fenech Adami was seen by another Maltese, Prof. Michael Camilleri, who recommended the intervention which was then successfully performed. Dr Fenech Adami later underwent other medical interventions in Malta.

Happy ending. After consultation with my editor, and given the restrictive libel laws, here’s a US presidential joke.
Remember when Bill Clinton had a bypass? Well, that operation turned out to be a success. The doctors told him, “Now Bill, from now on, lay off the fat.” And he said, “Look, I haven’t touched Monica in years…”