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Alan Montanaro is arguably Malta funniest current actor, maybe even our funniest actor ever. His lankiness and often clumsy coordination make him a perfect choice for certain roles. Alan has done it all in theatre – who can forget him playing dames - but comedy seems to come natural to him. As almost every year Alan is in this year’s Panto ‘Snow White has the Seven Dwarfs’ and he has also written the script. You will be able to catch him at any of the many performances that start 26 December.
What inspired you to start acting, were there any family influences?
I have no idea what actually sparked my love for theatre, but I do know it’s been there for as long as I can remember.
I do remember times when I would watch old time musicals on TV with my parents. I would learn the lyrics instantly and have been known to do a little Fred Astaire tap routine or two. My technique was crap but, hey, I was seven years old.
I also have fragmented memories of being taken to the theatre as a child. Ironically, I recall a production of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves by the Aerial Players (the British Services drama troupe). I vaguely remember that all the dwarves towered above Snow White. The rest of the details are fuzzy… but I do know that I was mesmerized for weeks. I also remember acting out the entire show out to my cousins.
You are considered to be Malta's funniest actor, how does that make you feel?
Am I? I didn’t know that. I’m chuffed. Especially since there are funnier people running the country for instance.
I’m not sure who I’m quoting here but someone once said that “comedy is a serious business” – and I do take it seriously. Very. Laughter is an important form of therapy to me. It’s helped me deal with some difficult times and will continue to do so. I like to laugh, and I like others to laugh with me. Not necessarily at me. With me.
I remember there was this one time when an ancient British lady congratulated me after a performance. I politely thanked her and started to make my way to the bar, but she firmly held on to my arm and proceeded to tell me that she knew what my secret was. My secret? She explained that I love what I do so much that my enthusiasm is contagious, it dives over the orchestra pit and slaps everyone in the face. Not my talent, mind you. My enthusiasm. I suppose that was the most genuine and heart-felt compliment I’ve ever been given.
Are there actors in Malta or abroad that you admire?
We’re a strange breed of people, we actors. We spend months studying lines that others have written, we slap cheap make-up on our faces and wear the most uncomfortable costumes, before diving on to a stage to be watched by 600 critics. Why do we do it? Why traumatize ourselves over and over again? I don’t have the answer to that question. I guess it’s akin to asking why the bungee jumper jumps.
I admire anyone who threads the boards in Malta - because we do it for the love of theatre. We certainly don’t do it for money. Once you remove financial gain you’re only left with “commitment” and “passion” and that’s got to be admired.
Of all your many roles which were the most memorable and why?
Tough one to answer. They’re all memorable. I’ve played a police constable, a homicide detective, a dandy, a transvestite, an actor, a jew, a playboy, a hen-pecked husband, and a priest, to name but a few. They’ve all been memorable.
Having said that, I will never forget playing Albin in La Cage Aux Folles for many reasons, one of them being the fact that I had to shave everywhere (yes, everywhere) one hour before curtain up. Apart from the fact that I ripped myself to ribbons, there were the ingrown hairs to contend with and they cropped up in places I only vaguely knew existed.
A more recent memorable role would be the one I played in Noises Off, during which I had to take a flying dive down a flight of steps and ended up in hospital after the second show with a bruised kidney. The worst part was knowing that I was going to have to take that death leap again the next day.
Did you ever have to prepare for a role in a way that you had to change a lot either physically or mentally? What can you tell us about those experiences?
Again, Albin springs to mind.
Now Albin was not a panto dame. Panto dames are grotesque caricatures best played by large men. Albin, on the other hand, was a transvestite – a performing drag queen. Besides vocal training, I was coached to keep my spoken voice a little higher than usual, and to make certain that I wasn’t over-doing the wrist-flapping. Albin was the lead role, I had to portray his suffering and dedication to his family in a sympathetic way. It was vital to the success of the show not to ridicule the character by over-playing his femininity.
What can you tell us about this year's Panto and your role therein?
Panto…panto… panto… what can I say? All the tried and tested ingredients are there. There’ll be some thigh-slapping, toe tapping, musical numbers, the usual sing-a-longs, a bit of slap-stick, and not just a little bit of magic.
Writing the show this year was a bit of a challenge because Snow White and the 7 Dwarves is probably the best known fairy-tale in the world. Everyone knows there are 7 little people, a magic mirror, a wicked queen, a beautiful girl and an apple. This means the plot is tight and doesn’t allow for much flexibility. Right? Wrong!!! We’ve managed to create some twists and turns that will keep the show interesting for adults and magical for children.
What is theatre adding to your life?
Well, theatre adds a sparkle to my life. It keeps me active. It keeps me passionate. It’s also opened a few doors for me. I recently signed a franchise agreement with the acclaimed Helen O-Grady Academy which is a development programme though drama. It helps children speak clearly and act confidently whilst teaching life skills in a dynamic and fun way. If anyone’s interested, check out www.helenogrady.com.mt . Enrolment would make a great Christmas present (nudge nudge, wink wink))
Does being so instantly recognised improve or worsen your quality of life?
Argh!! Such difficult questions. Sometimes being recognised is great. I’ve had a few drinks sent over to my table following a show. This, my dear readers, is a great and appreciated gesture. There have been times, however, when I have been harassed… and that can be an invasion of privacy.
I am often been asked why I don’t do much television. I’m not sure why not, but I guess once you’re present in people’s living rooms, its gives them the perception that they know you… and in extreme cases own you. It can get annoying or indeed embarrassing when you are called across a busy street by the name of a character you would have played (Ara, Gobonta). I remember this one time I was walking on the Sliema minding my own business when a political carcade was going by. I was spotted and suddenly the cars resumed their hooting in earnest and no less than three jam-packed truck loads started chanting “Ghax ghandna Zeza maghna, ahna maqghudin….”. It was quite funny actually.
What are your future plans?
Well, I’ve recently been elected Chairman of the MADC (Malta Amateur Dramatic Club), so I’m sure I’m going to be kept pretty busy. Having said that, I’ve been offered a part in 2 plays which I am currently considering. One’s a thriller, the other is a comedy. Do I break the mold and to the thriller? Do I stick to comedy? I don’t know. There is no way I can do both, so until I decide, I best keep my mouth shut about them.
If you could change three things in Malta what would they be?
Top of my list would be to completely eradicate the “u iva, mhux xorta” attitude, and the lack of hospitality in the service industry. A smile is free and makes all the difference. If you don’t like serving then get out of the industry.
I don’t pretend to be a staunch environmentalist but I am against littering in all its forms. I can’t comprehend the individual who drives his past-it washing machine to dump it in a rural valley. I’m also against hunting and trapping. What sport is it to shoot a little bird with a high-powered shotgun? Hunters should try doing it with a sling and give the bird a chance. And if they think they are upholding Maltese tradition, may I humbly suggest they take up bizzilla instead.
Finally, if I could, I would make Malta bigger. I’m pretty sure that if Malta where about the size of Sicily - we’d be a super power.
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